Gheed, travelling merchant
|Appears in:||Diablo II|
|Service(s):||gossip, Gamble and Trade services,|
|Portrayed by:||Brian George|
Gheed is a character located in the Rogue Encampment. He sells items and provides gambling. He's greedy, opportunistic, and cowardly. Most of the Rogues have no love for him (in the words of Kashya: "Gheed is a pig. I was tempted to throw him out of the camp many times."), with Charsi being the only exception who takes comfort in Gheed. In the beginning of Act 1 Gheed says he keeps Charsi's prices low by filling her head with stories of adventurers and he is secretly raking in all the cash. Gheed bears a special hatred towards Warriv, and will often make snide remarks about him. In Diablo II: Lord of Destruction, a unique grand charm titled Gheed's Fortune derives its name from the NPC. It adds to the player's percent chance of finding magical items, increased gold drops, and reduced vendor prices.
Gheed also seems very wary of the Necromancer who shows up at the camp. It can be inferred that Gheed has encountered necromancers before, though it is unclear if his fear is derived from anything a necromancer did or simply a fear of his craft.
At one point, he also says he is going with Warriv's caravan to Lut Gholein, but does not appear there in Act II. He stays at the Rogue Camp, and if the player returns from a later Act, he would complain that he is unable to sell anything since the rogues started moving back into the monastery.
"Good day to you partner! I'm Gheed and I can already tell that I'll be your best friend in this forsaken camp.
A spare weapon, some gold, a small gem, is all I want in exchange of the equipment you'll need on whatever quest you might undertake.
Now, now, now... Don't be shy. All of my items are guarenteed for life and come with a two day warranty!"
"A necromancer! I hoped I'd never have to lay my eyes on one of your kind again. ... The recent troubles in this area has brought out all kinds, I see. Nevertheless, your money's good... A spare weapon, some gold, a small gem, is all I ask in exchange of the equipment you'll need on whatever quest you might undertake. Now, now, now... Don't be shy. All of my items are guaranteed for life and come with a two day warranty!
- Andariel's demonic forces have taken up residence in the forests as well as the Monastery. Uh-uh. I won't be venturing out of the camp. So, if you need anything, I'll be right here.
- When - or if - I get to Lut Gholein, I'm going to find the largest bowl of Narlant weed and smoke 'til all earthly sense has left my body.
- Akara and Kashya are Sisters in the Order of the Sightless Eye, but they are worlds apart. Akara is a slow river of magic, and Kashya, a viper of war. They're both deeply devoted to their religious order, yet the corruption of their Sisters pains them both to no end.
- Charsi is a fine girl..., but she has no business savvy! I know she means well, but the prices she charges for weapons and armor will never earn her a profit. As long as I keep filling her mind with stories of adventure, she'll never catch on to the fact that I'm raking in gold hand over fist!
- That old coot, Cain, is as crazy as a wet Quill Rat. I hear he survived whatever happened in Tristram. Personally, I wouldn't trust a thing he has to say.
- Warriv was kind enough to let me travel with his caravan, but don't let him drag you into a search for a new Eastern trade route. I'm making a fortune right here... from the Rogues, of course! You, on the other hand, always get my best prices!
- Don't think you can fool me, Necromancer. I've seen what your kind can do. If you're involved in any of the evil out there, I don't even want to know. Trade quickly and be about your business!
- "You're a brave soul! I'd sooner thrust my sacred scepter into the foulest, carbuncular trull than set one boot into that cave."
- "Demons still befouling that cave, huh? I think you might need a new weapon.
- "The only good demon is a dead one, I say. By the way, did you happen to find anything in that cave you'd like to sell?"
- "I'm sorry...The undead are bad for trade. I have a strict no-return policy."
- "I wonder if that old gossip, Melra, is among the undead? Oh, she had dirt on everybody."
- "Some of those gals weren't so nice the first time around."
- "I would sooner micturate in a tankard of my own ale than journey to Tristram!"
- "Barking up the wrong tree, huh? You'll find it, just keep looking."
After finding the Scroll of Inifuss:
- "Look, friend...I trade a lot of strange items, but I'm not going to start dealing in bark. Okay?"
After Entering Tristram:
- "I'm told that Tristram now resembles a mead hall...after a Barbarian wedding! I will wait here for your most glorious return."
- "Ah, Cain is here...another customer. I haven't been this pleased since a love-starved maiden let down a bit more than her hair."
- "The only wealth you're likely to find there is a wealth of vermin."
- "Guess what! I've named a boil on my ass after you. It, too, bothers me every time I sit down."
- "Warriv's advice is like corpse gas; it befouls the air for a moment and then it disappears."
- "Charsi talks of nothing anymore, but this Horadric Malus. Between you and her my ears need a rest. Just find it and bring it back quickly."
- "I have heard that you bear us no Malus. [laughs]"
- "I guess it's too late to take back some of the names I called you."
- "You're going after Andariel? ...One of my wagon wheels is in need of repair. [shudders in fright] I'll be under the wagon, if I'm needed."
- "Have you stumbled upon that Demon Queen, yet? I hear she's quite the beauty...as far as Maidens of Anguish go, that is."
- "[cackles] I'm going to party like it's 999!"
Gheed is not present in Diablo III, but his daughter Kadala appears in Adventure Mode in Reaper of Souls. She does not specify who her mother was, but states that her father 'was a great man... before he lost his fortune'. She also asks the Nephalem if they had ever heard of Gheed, implying that he could have been quite famous across the land.